5 Ways to Bid Adieu

Bidding farewell is always hard, unless you are longing to move on from your present circumstances. Usually, the pull of ‘status quo’ is too strong and all we wish is to stay where we are, with people we are used to and with our routines that we have stuck to.
It has happened to me often that I have had to bid adieu to places. For all of my childhood and much of my adulthood, I have hopped from one place to another and in the process had a rich life of new experiences, different cultures and mind expanding circumstances. I am ready to move on, to adapt, to see the new, to view the different all because of the valuable experiences that change brings.

 
Due to a quirk of fate, the past few years saw me moving less and less. Although, I was always ready to leave, one foot in the door, always looking at what lay beyond, I had started putting down roots. But life is nothing but a movement and there is a time when we have to move on.
Even though it is painful to go from places that we invest so much in, it is also important to say goodbyes completely so that we can look back after a few years and remember only the good.
In the process of moving on, here are the things I wish we can do for peace. 

One
, say goodbye to the people that have mattered. Deep and close relationships are the bedrock of a stable and fulfilling life. Even though the world is networked as never before and talking to someone is as easy as the push of the ‘call’ button on the phone, yet to cease sharing the most insignificant details of your life with someone and let the frequent belly laughs subside because you no longer go through the same days can feel bad. So, acknowledge that this is going to happen and that your relationship is going to change. Say thank you to all those who have shared your world. And pledge to stay in touch and have a deeper relationship that defies distance.

Two
, say goodbye to the places as well. It may seem weird but we are as attached to the places we visit frequently. So, say goodbye to the parks you frequent, the restaurants you loved eating in, the theatres and the art galleries you have lingered in and the bends in the road that give you the first glimpse of your favourite landmark.

Three
, take memories with you. Of course, you have been making memories all along. Now, just gather them in your camera, in your scrapbook and as souvenirs. For you and your new friends.

Four
, plan to come back. Never say never. Life, with its unexpected twists and surprises may just bring you back. It has happened to me and with very pleasant results.

Five
, stay Grateful. Say good bye and at the same time, stay grateful for the wonderful memories and the learning. You were meant to be here and you were meant to move on. It is all a part of the Universe’s grandiose plan for you.
I just wish that this time I am ready to let go with grace and love. 

Dear Reader, tell me of the times that you have had to say goodbye to the things that mattered. Tell me how you managed. Tell me how to be accepting and graceful. 

This listicle is part of Friday Listicles, a weekly feature that professes our love for anything that is presented in a numbered or bulleted form, paving the way for a happy weekend. 


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18 Comments

    1. That’s true… Life must move on.
      I do wish that we know that when we are living fully and joyfully, we are also making memories.
      Thanks for reading and for your thoughts 🙂

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  1. I lost the love and partnership I thought I’d have for the rest of my life. This happened weeks ago. I said many goodbyes in one day. Goodbye to my wily 6lb dog. Goodbye to the business I had helped create to fulfill a life.

    I said goodbye to what I had thought of as my home. I let go of all of my possessions, except what I could fit in a backpack. Socks and a toothbrush and two books.

    How to be graceful? I knew what I thought I wanted. I found out I could not have it. I was not going to get what my mind had pictured. My mind is apparently not the boss of the universe.

    Grace is when we no longer defend our perception of power. Grace is when we no longer cling to the illusion of safety. We let go of the illusion of our own authority.

    I lost the possibility of what I had pictured for myself. And there are other things for me, which I cannot picture. Perhaps I will experience something larger than I am capable of imagining.

    How to be accepting? With help. I found that a childhood friend was my family. I found that complete strangers can open their eyes and see you. When you need it, a kind word from a police officer can give you the support you need to stand and walk away.

    With help, as I said goodbye to old things, I found new things.

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    1. Reading your comment, Chris, I wondered if I knew life at all.
      You speak of your loss, tremendous and potentially demoralizing. It is true that we craft our lives in our minds first and then expect the Universe to fall in line with our desires and wishes. And yet, when that does not happen, many of us feel dejected and unable to move on.
      The way you countered your adversity and loss is commendable. I am struck by your acceptance and humility and I understand that it is called Grace.
      I know now that there are greater plans for us that we are unable to see with our limited perception. There are helping hands all around us, even though they may not belong to the ones we know. I hope to be open to those possibilities and that support as you have done.
      Thank you so much for sharing a very vulnerable part of your life.
      I wish you the very best, Chris.

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  2. There are a lot of goodbyes that I have had in life. Moved a lot , saying goodbye to friends and houses, oh if the walls could speak.

    One goodbye that comes to mind now is saying goodbye to friends that I had lived with for a whole year, saying goodbye to the beach that I had lived within 10 minutes of that year. It was hard. Tears were shed and God gave me the strength to get through as hugs were exchanged and we all knew we were moving on with our lives. I believe that is what helped me. We were moving forward, everything has a season, and that year had been one of the best seasons of my life but the time was over. There were more adventures to have and so much more of life to experience. This was back when I was only 19 years old.

    I was bonded to my group of friends and the memories I will never forget, but I had to let go. We all did.
    I am happy to say that we all have stayed in contact through the years. That year had made an impact that we won’t forget. I believe that is what makes it easier to say goodbye as well. We knew that even though we were saying goodbye nothing,nothing would take the memories from our hearts. Nothing could change the way we grew that year and when you have so many positives like that, how can you let yourself despair.. You wipe your tears and you are grateful that you had experienced something that was so hard to say goodbye to!

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    1. Oh Joy, thanks so much for your lovely words!

      I read this and let it sink in. I tried to see how it must have felt for a 19 year old… To have wonderful experiences and to meet excellent people and then have to say goodbye.

      This is what I see now in my life, a little too frequently. Having to move on from the places I have loved and the people I have shared times with feels difficult at first.

      And yet, you are right. We have the memories and there is so much more to experience.

      It feels good to hear it from you, when you have been there, done that.. Musing on your words and experiences has given me strength these past few days.

      I apologize for taking so much time to appreciate your advice. I have been traveling and the network was really bad.

      Thanks again Joy for all the support.

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      1. You are so welcome, glad that my words and experience could help you! Thats what life is all about, helping each other along the way!
        Welcome back and hang in there, you will make it!

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  3. In my book I describe saying goodbye to Sado Island and a few days later my Japanese life as I had known it. Then, once again many years later I said goodbye to Japan and it was “for good.” This prompts me to write a little piece on my blog about it– hopefully without spoiling the story for anyone who who might like to read the real deal later!

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    1. I am sure at that time those goodbyes were hard. Even then, you have been able to look back with equanimity and talk about those experiences.

      Waiting to read your blog post about it. Or maybe you posted and I missed it. I have been off this space for a few days now.

      Thank you for your thoughts and sharing your experiences.

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  4. Saying goodbye might feel heavy at the moment and that’s when I stop living in the present and jump forward in time.. And from there, the new adventure looms large and the goodbye seems to be a necessary move from the past into the steps of future..

    In other words, I simply postpone the goodbye as much as I can and make sure I’ve no time for teary goodbyes.. Simply for the sake of remembering the location with only a smile always..

    And I do make time later to ensure my gratitude is known to the intended person and try as much to keep in touch with past..

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    1. We all have our own ways of dealing with awkward situations and times which we would rather not have.

      You handle these things and times with elan, focusing on the best and the positive and offering love and support to the people who matter to you.

      Thank you for sharing your thoughts. They bring much comfort and cheer 🙂

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